8 essential self-strengths you need to stop your overeating and how to get them
Self-love, self-care, self-trust, self-compassions, self-awareness, self-forgiveness, self-protection, and self-talk…
These are your self-strengths. I have so many things to say about these strengths that it’s hard to get it all out. It sounds like many of you feel the same way.
These self-things might be something you’ve spent years practicing, cultivating, and growing.
Or, maybe they’re something you know you need to work on but wish you knew how.
Or maybe you’re so deep in the struggle that it all sounds impossible and is probably just touchy-feely B.S. made up by some hippies.
I hear ya. I totally used to think that too. But, throughout my 5-year journey to heal my emotional eating, it all started to make sense – and now I know that without these self-strengths you can’t get to where your body, eating, and life are inviting you to go.
What am I talking about?
I know. You’re thinking:
“My unwanted eating isn’t inviting me to go anywhere other than the fridge! What do you mean?!”.
As I’ve said before: All eating happens for a reason. Any unwanted eating you do – like…
- stress eating
- obsessive thoughts…
are all an invitation to dig deeper, have an authentic relationship with yourself, and find out what you’re really hungry for. The more guilty, upset, or terrible you feel, the stronger the invite.
Basically, your struggle is inviting you to ask ‘why’.
Not “why me”, or “why am I so weak and pathetic”, but a deeper, calmer kind of ‘why’. It’s a ‘why’ driven not from a place of victimhood or desperation, but a true desire to know what’s going on for you underneath it all.
The true ‘why’
These true ‘why’s’ often have layers that you reveal the longer you ask the question and as your self-strengths grow.
This brings us back around to the original idea: That all this self-stuff is essential.
You can’t find the answers to the ‘why’ if you don’t trust yourself enough to deal with them. Or if you if you don’t care enough to ask. Or if you don’t love yourself enough to ask with compassion and without judgment.
In a nutshell: You can not heal your eating before you heal your relationship with yourself.
How do you know where to start?
Print this out (or open it up in ‘paint’ on your computer) and color in the wheel. The different statements around the outside reflect different aspects of your self-strengths. If you 100% agree with a statement, color up to the ’10’ mark (filling the piece of the wheel). If you definitely disagree, give it a ‘1’, or even don’t color at all.
When you’re done, you’ll have an easy to read visual representation of where it’s most important for you to start working. Here’s the breakdown:
- I’m aware of how I feel and why I feel that way: Self-awareness. Try the incredibly popular Emotional Eating 30-day Journal Challenge. You’ll learn more about yourself, your emotions, and your eating.
- I trust myself to do what’s best for me: Self-trust. Try reading I don’t trust myself with food and How to master your emotional triggers without turning to food.
- I take time out of my day to care for myself: Self-care. Take a look at How to make an epic self-care kit and How can you do Makeup and Self-Care?
- I have boundaries and can say ‘no’ to others: Self-protection. Start with The power of no for your emotional eating.
- I forgive myself when I make a mistake: Self-forgiveness. Coming soon.
- I like myself: Self-love. Start here: The Irresistible Self-Love Series.
- My self-talk is generally kind and encouraging: Self-talk. Find out the self-talk behind the 7 Ways you suck and what to do about it.
- I approach my eating challenges with curiosity: Self-compassion. Check out Why you struggle with emotional eating and how to stop and Why the hell you’re addicted to food.
Color in your ‘Wheel of Self-strength’ and see where your self-strengths need work. You can follow the links above for some juicy Live the Whole advice and activities related to each one, or use the question below to do a quick mental assessment or use them as journal prompts.
Going deeper, faster
If you want a personal, targeted, and effective way to not only end your overeating, but build up all this self-stuff and see results fast, I’d love to chat with you about working together. Seriously, emotional eating isn’t something you have to live with forever.
Whether you’re dealing with a physical addiction, an emotional reliance, or super commonly – both tied up in a messy emotional eating package – working with me and putting eating psychology into practice is one of the best ways to see real results. You can find out more – click here.